Feb 21st - A plethora of things have happened

I'm sure you all know exactly what's like to be intensively busy and you pretty much don't have time for anything except sleeping and eating in edgeways. It's been like that the past couple of days, except I invaded some of my sleeptime with watching 'The IT Crowd' but I'm sure if I hadn't, I would have killed everyone I know by now. 

So the show has been cast, in a surprising twist of fate The Guy was not cast as the main. No you read that right (should that be "yes you read that right?") - He didn't get it. Neither did I which is a pain in the ass. No, they went with a jock who is pretty high up on the pedestal and his entire head is a phallus. He's one of those guys who is just so damn awesome that they don't have to care about anyone's feelings because their feelings are more important, because he does sports. Whoop de fucking doo.

So their arguement for him to be cast in the role is that he looks the part. This guy is about 5'6", stocky and muscular, ugly as fuck but oh wait, he has curly hair. Jack Black had curly hair didn't he? Oh great, he'd be perfect because he has CURLY FUCKING HAIR.

Ok this is turning into a rage blog. (whiskers on kittens, whiskers on kittens, whiskers on kittens) Feeling better now. 

But I think the most frustrating thing about the whole casting process that they've gone through is that they are simply casting the parts as they resemble the characters in the movie OR they can play the instrument needed for those characters. In an awkward twist of fate, the teacher in charge of casting came up to me and said that I was hilarious in the audition but all the other parts were taken, so she was writing me a part. Wow, you might be saying, That's pretty dmn cool. 

Yes it is cool and this next paragraph is going to make me sound like a spoilt brat but hear me out. 

It's not cool, it's the opposite of cool. This proposition means 3 things:

1. They took pity on me
2. They're screwing around with a perfectly good script
3. I can't quit
   

That last one is the clincher. I had been asked months in advance to play horn for Les Miserables  up at the theatre in Orewa for $20 bucks a night. $20 a night for a 3 week season. I told myself while auditioning for the show that I would do it if I got a good part and would try to fit Les Miserables in or gratiously pull out of it. But now I haven't got a good part, I have a part that is likely to fuck up a good show, that will make no sense to fans of the movie and it's seriously in the way of my income stream.

If I pull out of School of Rock, my name is mud around school (Which it already is with the Head of Department - but that's a short story - She's a bitch and I'm not her beloved Guy), If I pul out of Les miserables, my name is mud at the theatre I've been at for 10 years and I will be broke for even longer.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH

Feb 11th - The Guy. AGAIN.

I'm getting so sick of The Guy.

You know how I said he said that he wasn't going for the part? 

He fucking was. GRRR

Absolutely hate it when people go back on what they say. I thinkt he worst part was that I had gotten my hopes up and was feeling great about my audition until I found out he was auditioning for the role. Not a chance in hell now.

Bet I'll get the part of the gay kid. I always either seem to bea charcter that's gay or in drag when I get cast.

Sigh.

Feb 7th - The Guy

I was kidding, I left the last post on a cliffhanger ending just to screw with you all. In reality The Guy turned to me and said of his own accord that he didn't want the main part. He may or may not have meant this but IF HE DID it means that some other loser (eg Me) actually has a shot at the part. 

So I've been Researching Tenacious D (Found the complete masterworks 2 at JB today so I'm really happy I don't have to order it from the states) and gearing up for the epic audish on tuesday.

Also avoid the Toyworld near JB in the albany mall LIKE THE PLAGUE. They have these high intensity neon lights that have a slight blue tinge to them which isn't bad, makes all the colours kinda buzzy. But the worst thing is they strobe. Really fast. I felt sick and anxious while under them. Not fun.

Any tips for the audition? How would you define Jack Black? cause someone else's viewpoint would help :P

Feb 6th - My main man JB

The next blog asked me to read this card, so here goes: "In the ancient mists of time and space, there was a man who did make sweet sweet music with the goddess of reason who bestowed upon him the powers of pure awesome." He is here, Give it up for JACK BLACK!

After the lukewarm reception of The Wind in the Willows last year and with the emmigration of our resident director, the new drama teacher has proposed an epic show for this year's production. The School of Rock. 

I'm excited, you can tell because I'm using bold lettering and italics every now and again for emphasis. I am one of the hugest fans of Tenacious D, I can sing every song of theirs, almost perfectly - even more perfect when tipsy. Tenacious D and The Pick of Destiny is my ultimate guilty pleasure movie. It was created with the fans in mind. They didn't give a shit about people who didn't catch the memo of what they were missing out on in life and that's why it bombed but is amazingly good.

I wasn't excited when the news first came out about the show because my school is host to a phenomena you may or may not be familiar with. It's called 'The Guy syndrome'. What this entails is that the school has one The Guy. The Guy gets everything he wants and some things he doesn't want. He is The Guy that the young ones look up to and the elders despise as he has everything they ever wanted and he is everything they ever wanted to be because he is The Guy.  No-one fucks with The Guy.

So when I tell you that I had a momentary glimpse of something awesome, it was shadowed by the presence of The Guy. I knew I had no chance of fulfilling my dream, of pretending to be The Ultimate Guy -  Jack Black because The school's The Guy would get the part, hands down, no questions asked. I was crushed. I was angry. Worst of all, I was vengeful.

I knew I had to kill The Guy.